Q: Do we have to be in conflict or have problems to participate in RCA?
A: No. Many couples choose RCA so they can build healthy relationships from the beginning. Some have grown up in dysfunctional families, or they may have been in previous relationships. All of us have good days and bad days. We build on our strength, which can help us during our struggles.
Q: Do you have to be in another 12-Step program to be in RCA?
A: No. Although we strongly suggest that both members of a couple be in an individual recovery program as well as RCA, it is not required. At the very minimum, both members should be willing to learn more about the 12-Step process as individuals and as a couple.
An important theme in RCA is that both members of the couple need to take responsibility for the dysfunction of the relationship and any unhealthy behaviors -- including family-of-origin messages, abuse experiences, or unrealistic expectations.
We have found that individual recovery in any of the various 12-Step fellowships does not necessarily promote couple recovery. One successful formula has been: My individual recovery plus your individual recovery plus our couple recovery equals our healthy recovering relationship.
Q: Can we participate in RCA if we are separated, divorced, dating, or a gay / lesbian couple?
A: Yes. A couple is any two people who desire to remain in a committed relationship. RCA “has no opinion on outside issues…” including race, marital status, or sexual preference.
Q: How do you become a member of RCA? Do we have to commit?
A: The only requirement for membership in RCA is that you are a couple who desires to remain committed to each other and to restore a caring, committed, and intimate relationship. You are a member if you participate in the program. You do not have to sign up.
Q: How much does RCA cost?
A: There are no dues or fees. The Seventh Tradition states: “Every RCA group should be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.” Our contributions are used for rent, literature, supplies, and support of the RCA World Service Office.
Join us!! In RCA we are learning to cherish and enjoy our relationships with our life-partners. We learn that our struggles and troubles are not unique. We gain hope and assurance that our own coupleship can recover and grow. With the aid of our Higher Power, we can restore commitment and intimacy to our relationship.